When it comes to the animal kingdom, bruins and ducks don’t have a whole heck of a lot in common. From what I’ve seen on National Geographic, they don’t particularly like each other, either. Bruins are indigenous to Southern California, and the Commonwealth of Massachusetts. Ducks are indigenous to the Pacific Northwest, and once upon a time, Hollywood.

With such a pantheon of memorable sports movies, it’s no mystery as to why Disney’s “The Mighty Ducks” trilogy has been lost in the noise. Films like “Miracle” or “Slapshot,” speak to a wider demographic of viewers.

“The Mighty Ducks,” and more specifically, its sequel, “D2”, is one of the more underrated and beloved sports films for Millennials and parents of Millennials. A brief synopsis: head coach and former professional Gordon Bombay, (played by Emilio Esteves), leads a group of skilled underdogs into the “Junior Goodwill Games” to represent the United States. They are set on a collision-course to face off with the big, bad, and villainous, Icelandic team. Spoiler alert: Team USA wins.

So, I’m here to answer the question that’s on your minds right now: If the Bruins were the starting five of the Mighty Ducks, which would each player be? I’m glad you asked, let’s excavate a bit deeper and find out…

Patrice Bergeron, Center: Patrice is not a duck, nut he sure can fly around the ice and make his presence felt. If he were on Bombay’s squad he’d surely be Guy Germaine, the durable workhorse you can always count on. Guy didn’t play in enough games to score thirty-two goals like Bergeron did last season, but the spirit is there.

Brad Marchand, Left Wing: When I think of Brad Marchand, I think of finesse and gaudy numbers, I think of… Adam Banks. Banks was the superstar of the Ducks. The one the rest of the team looked to for a spark on offense and in the locker room. In a critical position like left-wing, Marchand is called upon to be involved in every play up and down the ice. To have the power to turn fortunes around, just like Adam Banks.

Zdeno Chara, Defenseman: Here he is. The captain. Who else could Chara be but Charlie Conway, the embattled leader of the Mighty Ducks? Conway went through all the highs and lows with Gordon Bombay, and had the ability to make his teammates better. Chara is a cerebral player, a skillful goal-scorer, and an efficient passer. What he lacks on the stat-sheet, he more than makes up for in maturity and leadership.

Loui Eriksson, Right Wing: During the Bruins last playoff run, Eriksson was instrumental in helping his team’s cause netting three goals. Points and goals always come at a steep premium during playoff hockey because, usually, the opponent has a hot goalie. That’s why I’m designating him as Russ Tyler, the “knuckle-puck” kid. Russ was rough around the edges but a fierce competitor who would find ways to help his team win.

Torey Krug, Defenseman: Okay, a little cheating here, but it will make sense. In Krug, I see a little of both Fulton Reed, and Dean Portman, better know as the “Bash Brothers”. He’s a player with youth, talent, and the right amount of grit. Reed and Portman were grinders and bad boys, hurting the team with penalty minutes for outrageous offenses. One of Krug’s strong suits is that he tends to stay out of the sin bin, making him even of a value to his team.

Tuukka Rask, Goalie: This was going to be another two-for-one, but on the eye test, Tuukka Rask is most like Julie Gaffney. Gaffney was a quick-handed rival to the Ducks original goaltender, Goldberg. Goldberg had a propensity to be soft as a Charmin commercial. Rask had a .915 save percentage last year. That’s pretty good. It also reminds me of Julie Gaffney’s show-stopping glove save in the shootout against Iceland to win the whole thing.

This time of year is filled with a whole lot of awesome with a side of epic. While football is sure to be our main distraction for the next several months, the hockey team in Boston will be worth keeping an eye on. Who know? Maybe they’ll even make a movie about this year’s team.

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