The Dirty Dozen: How Belichick Got the Black Eye

A few items to share while wondering how much spirulina Pablo Sandoval has been spreading on his waffles this winter.

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(Providence Journal Photo by Mary Murphy via Twitter)

A few items to share while wondering how much spirulina Pablo Sandoval has been spreading on his waffles this winter.

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Now the question is, how did Bill Belichick get the black eye? We’re hearing one report that he fell out of his Lazy-Boy and hit it on a coffee table while watching his friend Nick Saban seal the deal in Phoenix last night. Another source said Lady Gaga bumped into him on her way to accept the Golden Globe award Sunday. Someone familiar with the situation tells us Belichick banged his head on the helicopter door while returning from his interview to become HC of the NYGs.

But there is no truth to the rumor that he was targeted by Cincinnati bad boy Vontaze Burfict while taking in the Bengals-Steelers game or that Blair Walsh kicked him in the face on the game-winning field goal attempt in Minnesota.

The best guess is he made the mistake of saying “sure” when Tom Brady asked him if he wanted to “have a catch.” When Belichick was pressed about the injury Tuesday, he replied, “I think I’ll live,” adding, “I don’t think we need to list the coaches on the injury report.”

On a related note, The MMQB has a story on Belichick’s film segments today appropriately entitled: The Mad Scientist Doesn’t Wear Makeup.

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Hanley Ramirez (third from right), with Red Sox manager John Farrell (second from right) and others. (Via Instagram/Hanley Ramirez)

Speaking of football players, middle linebacker Hanley Ramirez was paid a visit by Red Sox manager John Farrell in Florida. Ramirez was asked to lose 15 pounds this offseason as he looks to put a disastrous 2015 behind him and transition to a first base. Smiles aside, all signs point to this as not ending well for Han-Ram in Boston with three years to go on his four-year, $88 million deal. It’s not that he’s lazy…

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In other overpriced Red Sox player news, Rusney Castillo is 1-for-16 with six strikeouts since joining Caguas in Puerto Rico for the team’s playoff run.

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The man of the hour says he’s ready to go “full throttle” on Saturday afternoon. Tom Brady has been without Julian Edelman for seven games as his favorite target has been recovering from a broken foot. So goes Edelman, so goes the offense. The smart money says you can book your trip to Denver.

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Tom Brady addressed the media Tuesday. Outside of announcing that he’s “not the easiest guy to play with,” TB12 said a whole lot of nothing and played it right down the middle when asked about Edelman’s return for Saturday’s playoff game against the Chiefs: “I think the more dependable, consistent players that are out there the better our offense is going to be,” Brady said. “He’s been one of them for as long as he’s been here. Depending on what he can do we’ll try to find ways to integrate him. Whoever’s out there we’re going to have to have confidence in, like I said there’s no next week, so we’re going to have to do everything you can do to be out on the field and help us win.”

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Stop the presses, the lollygagging Bruins lost to the Rangers in New York Monday night when Jesper Fast scored on a deflected puck with 1.42 to play. The Black & Gold are now 2-6-1 in their last nine games and are one point north of being in 6th place in the Atlantic division.

“We have to learn to win tight games,” Bruins coach Claude Julien said after the 2-1 loss. ”Need more desperation at the end. We were good for the first 40 minutes. The third period just wasn’t as good.”

Speaking of slip-sliding away in New York, the stumbling Celtics take on the Knicks tonight.

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Interested in seeing what the Boston ratings were for Monday’s night’s national college football championship between Alabama and Clemson on every ESPN channel. Boston has never been a big college sports town, unless you’re following the college you went to. Boston has been, and always will be, a pro-sports town.

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This just in: Daily fantasy sports gambling is for scripts and suckers, part 234. “…Sharks are free to flood the marketplace with thousands of entries every day, luring inexperienced, bad players into games in which they are at a sizable disadvantage. The imbalanced winnings in D.F.S. have been an open secret since this past September, when Bloomberg Businessweek published an exposé on the habits of high-volume players. The numbers are damning. According to DraftKings data obtained by the New York State attorney general’s office, between 2013 and 2014, 89.3 percent of players had a negative return on investment. A recent McKinsey study showed that in the first half of the 2015 Major League Baseball season, 91 percent of the prize money was won by a mere 1.3 percent of the players.”

Speaking of the dreaded Daily Fantasy Sports, Mark Cuban has invested in a Massachusetts-based daily fantasy sports startup, but it’s not Draft Kings.

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(Via New England Patriots Alumni on Facebook)

The New England Patriots Alumni reminds us: “Today marks the 30th Anniversary of the first Patriots AFC Championship. Your New England Patriots beat the Miami Dolphins (‘Squish the Fish’) 31-14 behind an offensive line that posted 255 rushing yards (Craig James, Robert Weathers, Tony Collins, Mosi Tatupu) and 5 turnovers by the defense and special teams. The win was the first for the Patriots at the Orange Bowl since 1966, the Dolphins inaugural season, ending a string of 18 consecutive losses by the Patriots in Miami and earning the Patriots their first trip to the Super Bowl in franchise history.”

“This was my favorite team I have covered in 34 years of sports,” Dirty Water Sports Alan Miller said. “They were a tremendous group not only of players but people. I was in Miami the day they beat the Orange Bowl jinx and Squished the Fish. It was thrilling and I will never forget the raw emotion of these great players after the win.”

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Are you ready for some football in LA? The NFL is moving toward having the Rams and Chargers share a stadium in Inglewood California.

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No surprise to see Tim Wakefield and Jason Varitek heading into the Red Sox Hall of Fame. And no surprise that Pawtucket Red Sox chief Larry Lucchino — also heading to the Red Sox Hall — is still taking shots at the Yankees.

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If Jim Caldwell doesn’t return to the Detroit Lions. Look for either Josh McDaniels or Matt Patricia to get a call from former Patriot executive turned Lions GM Bob Quinn, who said he has a “great relationship” with both New England coaches. “I think they’re both ready and willing to be head coaches,” Quinn said Monday.

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Deflategate rolls on, but so does Carportgate.  “I still need it, man,” Danny Amendola told WEEI on Monday, adding, “It’s legal and it comes in handy.”